Olive Under Grace

did it again

2008-03-15T12:00:00.002-05:00

Life is just too busy for me to add blogging in so I did it again, I din't even stop by here for two months. Now that is no way to run a blog. I haven't even been reading some of my favorite blogs like sweet Abby and Rocks in my Dryer (ok, I read it this week b/c of LOST) AND I haven't even had time to POST here about LOST at all this season. Crazy busy my life is, I tell ya!

Also, I wanted to keep my name private on here, but assuming another moniker never fit me and I always felt like I was trying a dress that was too big, hoping it would shrink and eventually feel comfortable. It never has.

In a little over a month I'll have my "blogiversary" but I didn't even post 50 times in that year, so I will start a new blog soon, put up a link here, and something I intend to keep up with. It'll be different, because I think mostly it'll host my thirifting treasures (and my Pyrex OBSESSION) and I'll chat once in a while on it. Pyrex I know will keep me coming back to blog. :)

Oh, and since I'm on here today, Happy 27th Birthday to me. :)

disappearing act

2008-01-01T23:27:00.000-06:00

WOW! It's been two months since I've posted! Over two months, in fact. One of my "New Year's resolutions" is to blog more. Despite my general dislike for "New Year's resolutions", I made a few anyway this year. I've got a few others, but I'll save that for another post.

Sorry for the disappearing act, anyone who reads this, but the last few months have been SO insanely busy I've hardly seen the light of day. To begin with, Praise God, I found a full-time job! I'm thrilled. The company I was working with part-time got itchy in mid-September about me leaving and did a lot of keep me full-time. And, while not much of a pay bump (oh the non-profit pains- just kidding) it is more responsibility and more of a challenge. I'm doing something now that I NEVER would have thought I'd ever do. I'm the writer (mostly marketing writing) as well as the marketing project manager. It's hard sometimes, but like I said, fun and challenging. Also, it's very very busy.

Part B of why I've disappeared is because this Christmas marked 2 years since my dad died. Well, actually he died on the 27th, but Christmas is just hard still, and maybe always will be in some senses. And, as a result of it being hard, I unknowingly tend to "go dark" around this time of year. Where most people are going out, having parties with old friends, I just want this time of year to pass quietly.

So, I'm back. It's a new year and the "yuckiness" is over, it's time to blog again!

jaw drops open

2007-10-23T19:59:00.000-05:00

I so totally just found something I want to do some day!

the Matriarch

2007-10-02T22:59:00.000-05:00

I am by no means an animal lover. I pretty much think all animals are just dirty. And they lick you, and get hair on you, and track dirt all over. It's gross. I dislike cats most of all. They REALLY rub up on you. Also, I'm allergic to cats. My dislike of animals runs so deep that I rarely even think "cute animal videos" are cute. I usually find them obnoxious.

My sister, on the other hand, couldn't love animals more. She is a fanatic to the nth degree. She will someday be in a career involving animals, though I don't know what she'll do in that regard yet. She's terribly appalled at my dislike of the animal kingdom and even questions if I hate animals. For the record, I don't. I do not wish bad things upon animals. I do not hate animals. I do not want animals to disappear from the earth entirely. I just don't want to have any pets. Nor do I want to be forced to think they are cute. I think may other things are cute. Like babies.

But.

Then I met Meerkat Manor. I was hooked instantly. I haven't missed an episode. I loved the story of this family struggling to survive in the Kalahari Dessert. There were times I cried, like when Shakespeare died. There were times I held my breath, like when Flower evicted her daughter Mozart. There were times I cheered, like when Mozart found her own tribe to breed within and survive. There were times I shuddered, like every time I saw scary one-eyed Hannibal.

Then, there was Flower. I had a love/hate relationship with her. She was harsh. She cast out her daughters if they got pregnant, so that she could remain the dominant female and retain breeding rights. She led her family with the cunning art that's needed in such a harsh environment. And she loved on her new pups with each new litter. Sometimes she had grace and forgiveness in her, sometimes revenge and brutality. Throughout it all, she was a brave leader for her family.

This week I sat and wept as she bravely defended her newborn pups as any mother would. She met her match in a cobra who showed no mercy. From a person who really wouldn't call herself an "animal person", I have fallen in love with these meerkats, and will sorely miss Flower. The Manor won't be the same; and neither will this "non-animal person".

Lila

2007-09-23T22:33:00.000-05:00

Oh. My. Goodness. This girl is too cute! I just want to give her a hug and play dolls!

Ouch.

2007-09-20T23:03:00.000-05:00

Another area that God has been working in my life is my thought process towards dating and marriage. I randomly picked up a book at Northwestern Bookstores called Press Play. It's good, and an quick read, but what hooked me was the first chapter.

It's one of those things that's like a page out of my life. As she's recalling her dad's death (I know I talk about this a lot, and I truly don't mean to, but bear with me here for a minute) I was remind of my dad's death. I've had a hard time since then even being open to dating and she hit the reason dead on. It's a simple little promise she made after his death:

"Never again will I let anyone so deep into my heart that they can
hurt me this badly when they leave."

Ouch. That hurt. I've made that promise secretly too. I don't want to let my dad's death hinder the way I relate to people. I don't want his death to stunt me emotionally. It's a hard thing to admit, but I'm asking God to break that thought process and (in a non-"new age-y" way) allow me to be "open" to the things He has in store for me and not be afraid of them.

This secret promise has been on my heart even though I didn't really know it, and it hurts to see it in print, but after a good cry and with God's help I'm being led out of it.

Wait. Does that mean I have to start dating again?

Patience

2007-09-20T21:30:00.000-05:00

Man, God is sure doing something in me. Not sure exactly what that something is but I'm, for one of the first times in my life, actually enjoying this waiting time and being patient. I know it's only been a week, but it's still exciting. Usually patience for me is something I have to fight at to get and something I need to constantly remind myself to ask for. It's easier for me to worry, and I can easliy give in to it. But, this last week, I haven't worried and I have been blessed with patience. Ok, now that I wrote that, it sounds strange and gloaty (is that a word?) but I don't mean it that way. I feel that for the almost two years since my dad's death I have begged for patience regarding my place in life. While tomorrow I may get impatient again, today (and the last week) I have not been, and for that I am grateful to my God. He is so good!

Last Wednesay, (two days after my interview) I felt like God was calling me out of hoping for that job. And, lo and behold, I was pleased as punch to follow is His leading and stopped thinking about the job. I almost even forgot about the position until they called yesterday to tell me they were "pursuing someone else, but it was close and I am next on the list". Heh. First- next on the list??? Do you really want to tell people that? What if you have to move to that next person? Do you want them to know that they were your second choice? Maybe it's just me, but I thought it was funny. Second- I let him know that God was calling me into something different and I was glad they were pursuing someone else, but "thank you for taking the time to meet with me". He almost seemed a bit shocked that I said that, but oh well. I'm at peace with the situation. I still want a new job, but I am happy to wait for just the right thing.

I've also had a good friend speak into my life and tell me things she thinks I should be doing and things I shouldn't even apply for because she knows me and knows I'd ultimatley hate it and that wouldn't be Glorifying to God. I'm praying about the things she's asked me to consider (more working with students in a more concentrated, even in a pastoral way- yikes!). It's scary, but I want to listen to the Lord and wait on His timing. I know the things I like to do (wedding/event planning) but is that what He wants me to do? Is that how I can best honor Him with my life? In what way can I serve Him better? In what way can I bring Glory and Honor to the Almighty? In what capacity will I point people to Jesus? Many of these things are just things that I'm searching out in my "non-work life", but I want to have a ministry in my "work life" as I think all Believers are called into ministry no matter where they are. Yes, as long as I'm walking with Him and following His leading I'm honoring Him with my life, but of course I want that to translate into my "work life" as well. Does that make sense? It totally did in my head. ;)

So, I wait. I know it'll happen when He's ready for me to move on to a new job and out of this "transition phase" and in the meantime, I'm loving this sweet time with God.

Wanty!

2007-09-12T23:03:00.000-05:00

1, 2, 3, 4. Tell me that you love me more.

Frost advisory

2007-09-11T22:06:00.000-05:00

I've been so busy since the Fair that I've totally forgotten to update! To begin with, the State Fair was a TON of fun. We (my friends and I) ran into Marjorie Johnson. I let her know that she came to my foods class in high school and that I still have and use her cinnamon roll recipe. She was SO sweet (and exactly the same way she is on Leno!) and excited about that! She also invited me to her book signing on this Friday (I'm totally going). I had already wanted her cookbook, and am so excited to get it signed. :)

Before going to the Fair, though, my mom, sister, brother and I went to the cemetery b/c it was the day before my dad's birthday. I was extremely emotional all of last week as a result. It's terribly hard to just be "normal" on days like that. His birthday is always the worst. Even worse than the anniversary of his death. I miss him terribly and wish things were "normal" again, but this "new normal" we have isn't so strange anymore. Plus, what is "normal" anyway?

I've been wrestling with the notion of being "happy" for about a month now. Maybe it was my dad's impending birthday, maybe it's that I HAVEN'T FOUND A JOB YET, maybe it's placing my hope in things (like a new job) in things more than I thought and less on God and His Word (my intention), or maybe it's upcoming anniversary of Payton's death.

A few weeks ago Abby mentioned the idea of "happiness" I never mentioned it to her, but it really did resonate with me. I want the "pretty life" too, and I need to deal (and not in a begrudgingly way) with the fact that I don't have what I want (a new job, a place of my own, a husband, babies, then another new job of staying home with my kids- could I get greedier?) because of God's sovereignty and plan for my life. Maybe someday He will bring those things into my life, but right now they are not His best for me. That's hard sometimes and frustrating, but that's where I need to rest. In His plan and in His grip.

I had another job interview yesterday. They all go SO well, and we (my interviewer and I) hit it off and everyone says they are so impressed with me, my skills, and my resume. Then, I make it to the next round of interviews and things go well again. But, they hire someone else. Fan-flippin-tastic. It's so frustrating. I don't know yet if I "made it" to the next round for this job, but the interview did go well (though I did find my self thinking my interviewer- single and a Christian- was cute! What's wrong with me???). But, then, after the interview, I got so frustrated again because my pessimistic self got all down about how "of course I won't get it".

I was reminded then of Job. He was stripped away of so many things and yet he praised God continually! Yes, he poured his heart out, yes he wondered why, but He knew God was still there. Job 2:10 says "...Shall we indeed accept good from God and not accept adversity?..." I so often want the good things and not the "bad". I see myself in a new phase of life- and have been for a while- and I just want the rest of my life to start. I want the things that I don't want to be gone (my dad still alive, this "transition" phase to be over) and I want the things I do want to be here already (a new job... yada, yada...insert previous obnoxious, greedy list...) but I need to accept all of it and live my life fully in a way that's Glorifying to God.

I had a review at work this last week, and seriously, it couldn't have gone better. But I still need something new for a variety of reasons, so clearly I am sick because I know they want the best for me and they want to help me find something (it's a nonprofit w/ not a lot of funding and they can't give me something full-time and salaried even though I do 40+ hrs of work crammed very quickly into 20+ hrs to save them money. It's just not an option to make it full-time right now for them, so whatever). Things are going well and I'm where God wants me right now, I'm just very anxious for the next thing to start, but I need to be patient!!!

I don't know if all of this made sense, but that's where I'm at right now. Suffice it to say that it's easy to praise God when things are going well, but I am getting a little drained praising Him when things aren't going well. I'm working on it, but I am a work in progress.

On a more fun note, I've been thrifting a bit more lately and have found some AMAZING deals! My vintage Pyrex collection is growing and it's so fun to find great pieces!

Finally, on a disturbing note, my arch nemesis announced a frost advisory tonight. It's a bit north of the Twin Cities, but still, a frost advisory in September???? What the heck! I think I need to move away from the north!

heh.

2007-08-31T00:06:00.000-05:00

My new dream is to have something to put on this site someday.

It's here!

2007-08-30T23:09:00.000-05:00

This weekend, I am going (praise Jesus!) to the Great Minnesota Get Together. It. Is. Divine. I can't wait for the food! And, I enjoy the free stuff. The good free stuff, mind you, not the crap free stuff. That's just crap and no one needs more crap. But, alas, more crap they (the evil fair crap givers) giveaway each year. Whatever. Anyway, I perused the free things booklet online, and have a few questions and a couple tips:

1. Is this a real fan, or are they leaning towards "energy wise fans" being of the handheld variety? I'm think the latter, and I'm not amused, Great River Energy.

2. Can get a Jack Bauer poster here? Or even a Wentworth Miller, er, Prison Break poster? Pretty please? Not that I need something like that, and certainly wouldn't put it up- but it's a funny thing to have and could be a great joke at work. Add it to the list of places to check out.

3. If you're smart, you plan ahead at the fair. Example: Go here when you're thirsty. Then go here to fill up your new find (and possibly not keep said new water bottle. It's just crap. Crap that, for the day is serving a purpose, but will no longer do so at home. It'll be crap taking up space then. Maybe donate it so you're not throwing it away, but seriously. GET RID OF IT.). By the by, news places crack me up. Which leads me to tip #4.

4. Sometime, in a separate blog, I shall introduce you to my arch nemesis. But, for now, suffice it to say that some news stations here take their personality- well, just one- way too seriously and puff him just a smidge. 'nuff said. For now.

5. Seriously, a Medica temporary tattoo? Really? Really?

6. This? A God-send at the Fair (yes, it can be called just the Fair and it is proper to capitalize it).

7. How random is lipbalm? From a university no less?

It's weird, it's greasy, it's a bit smelly, and it's wonderful I just can't wait.

Works For Me Wednesday

2007-08-29T21:56:00.000-05:00

I've never participated in a Works For Me Wednesday, and probably never had any intentions to, but as I was completing my nightly ritual last night, I was reminded of something that DOES "work for me".

I'm a night showerer and afterwards I have always put a little lotion on my feet (I read somewhere recently- probably Real Simple- that it's good for your feet and circulation to give yourself a little foot massage w/ lotion at the end of the day- I know I always like it!) and elbows and put some socks on (at least for a while- in the summer it's too stinkin' warm to wear socks for long, plus I hate sleeping in socks anytime of the year). I've never had gross feet or even really dry feet, but in the summer I wear only flip-flops and my feet get a little dry and rough.

That was until I met this lotion (I use the Shea Butter one). Never in my life have I had softer skin and not even the slightest hint of dryness or roughness (is that a word?) on- nay even near- my feet. I use it all over and find it even a bit repairing like this lotion, which if you live in a cold weather state you MUST own- it heals all sorts of wind-chapped hands. Also, it (the 1st lotion) is very light and goes far. It's not greasy and it makes you feel all silky and smooth. I just like touching my feet after the lotion's on- they're so nice!

Anyway, it works for me! :)

How was that for my first time? Should I do commercials or what?

P.S. I actually just found the link to the Real Simple article that talks about massaging your feet.

mistake?

2007-08-22T00:36:00.000-05:00

Since I'm new to blogging, I guess I don't know "the rules" all that well. Yesterday night I was checking the blogs I frequent and saw a picture on one of the blogs I love. I've been lurking for a year there and not commenting (oops! mistake #1) and have come to love what this sweet woman has to say about her family. When I started reading, she was pregnant and I think that's what made me stay. I'm a sucker for pregnant women. I want to know that everything is ok, what they have, what they name their baby, and how they adjust. I love kids, and the nanny in me loves to see babies and how the family adjusts (I LOVE babies!). Plus, this mom has a sweet spirit and I've enjoyed reading about her sweet family.

Well, back to yesterday, I saw a picture on her blog and clicked on it b/c I was a bit concerned at first. I could see the logo of her son's private school uniform shirt. And, it made me nervous. Heck, ya'll don't even know my name b/c it's so rare that if I told you, and since you know I live in Minneapolis (b/c I just told you) you'd EASILY be able to find where I work at a minimum and probably even much more. SO, I keep it at Olive, which is a nickname (and my grandmother's name) so someone doesn't find me and who knows what. Plus, I'm a small, single girl with no husband (I knew that college degree would come in handy single=no husband, now I get it!), and no father to protect me, so I need to be careful. If I knew how, I'd put up a picture of me, but it wouldn't have any identifying markers, so again, I couldn't be found.

ANYway, I posted a comment to this woman to let her know (her email wasn't listed) and she removed the picture and I think even ALL pictures, though I didn't poke around her blog, I just thought I remembered a few other pictures lately, but I could be wrong. But, I haven't heard from her yet, nor has her posted anything today, so in my paranoid state, I feel like I've offended her or freaked her out. I hope not. I would hate for her to be upset about this, or for even posting the picture in the first place, or mad at me for butting in on her blog. I think she does a great job protecting her family's identity, and this was just a small thing, and it was luckily caught.

I guess I just need to be more careful of what I comment and to whom I comment. BUT, I will pray about the situation and for her. I hope someday she knows I was just trying to be helpful, but she may never (b/c of the aforementioned lack of email), and I will no longer butt in where I'm apparently not wanted/needed.

Live and learn, I guess.

Question.

2007-08-22T00:10:00.000-05:00

Maybe it's me, but do the TV people think we're stupid?

Why is it that EVERY STINKIN' TIME someone on TV gets a phone call with bad news, they HAVE to say (while looking utterly confused, almost as if they'd never even seen their cell phone before) "Wait, slow down. You're. I. I. I can't understand you. You're talking too fast. Now, slow down. What's wrong?"

????

Have you ever got a call like that? Why is that EVERYONE in TV land gets the same call, from the same Micro-Machine talking crazy that can't just, you know, ACTUALLY SAY WHAT HAPPENED.

TV people: we know, from the poorly timed phone call in the middle of their most happy moment, or the eerie music looming, or even the wistful way they're remembering the friend/family member who's about to get in an accident, that the news is coming. And, guess what? You're not in any way being original. You're just replaying the same lame scene over and over again.

Ok, that was several questions. But, in my experience, bad calls start with "ok, everyone's ok, but...(yada, yada, yada)", or "something happened.... (yada, yada, yada)" or even "mom? (that's me saying "mom?")... I got hit by a car (trying to stifle tears, but not in ANYWAY speaking auctioneer style)" [side note- that last one was totally real- and from two springs ago]. But, in my admittedly limited experience with "bad" phone calls, they're not all the frantic, hysterical, I-can't-breathe-but-I-have-to-tell-you-something kind of news. Yes, those calls exist, but that's the ONLY kind of important/bad-news calls TV people get?

It's just like how EVERYONE in TV land has twins.

Funny how that works, huh?

I am sick.

2007-08-20T23:35:00.000-05:00

Confession.

Hi. My name is Olive and I'm a shopaholic.

What's that you say? Shop for what?

Oh, well, anything. Let's be honest. I'd shop for more stores to shop in if I could. Heh. Wait. I think I have. I LOVE to shop. I simply, truly, undeniable love it. The hunt. The find. Oh, the find! And a sale? Are you kidding me???? It's my crack. I got a good taste when I was younger and it was good; I was instantly hooked. Now, I'm a full-blown addict. I can't help myself.

"Tomorrow, I promise to stop."

Yeah, heard that one before. The seduction of another, beautiful sale inevitably lures me in with its addictive cracky-ness. That sick, black-magic woman and her schemes to find nice, vintage Pyrex a good home. Why, Goodwill, why??!! You're price-points are clearly rooted in some sort of devilish, crack-filled schemes. And I fall for it every time.

I fall victim to my crack addiction every time. Rescue vintage dinnerware, certain for a fate of someone who won't love it as well as me? Oh, no, I couldn't do that to it. I'll volunteer to rescue it. Milk glass? Bring it on! Vintage fabric? That's the mother-lode. It's my meth.

Sick. Sick. Sick.

That's me. And, I'm ok with it.

Well, at least mostly.

What I did on my summer "vacation"

2007-08-12T11:27:00.000-05:00

I'm sorry I've not been very good at this blogging thing. I just get so busy (which is weird b/c I'm single, don't own my own home, and frankly, don't work all that much) that by the time I get home, I can't think of a thing to post. BUT I have been busy somehow. AND I have a few fun links for ya'll.

Contests:

1. Ashwin is having a contest to win $2500. Obviously the odds of winning aren't great, but I guess someone has to right? Enter here.

2. 5 Minutes for Mom (I hope I can count since I'm not a mom) is hosting a contest for a giant flat screen tv. YAY! Who doesn't want one of those?

Now onto me:

First of all, about 6 weeks ago I cut off 13" of my hair (and forgot to take a picture). It's the 2nd time I've done that and then donated to Locks of Love. A friend did it, and I said she could do whatever she wanted as long as it's short and fun. Boy did she deliver. The longest layer was about 1-1/2" below my ears (now closer to 2"- my hair grows fast!) and there's a lot of layers and side bangs too. I can do anything with it! I love my hair (despite the tendency to frizzy-ness, but I've learned to just live with it)- it's very malleable. I can flip it all out and it's fun and spiky, I can turn it all under and it looks like a bob, I can straighten it can it's looks all Vogue-like and hip, I can turn out the bottom, and turn under the top (which I do most days) and it's got a lot of bounce and body and I get lots of compliments. It's a fun hair cut.

I'm STILL looking for a new job. I hate that I'm still looking. Granted, I don't put as much time as I could into looking, but that's because I'm discouraged and getting tired and weary of waiting for whatever God has next for me. And I'm trying to not be "waiting" and be able to live in the moment. I know He is good, and has me where I'm at for a reason. I just want to be doing something else now and wish it were God's timing too.

My baby sister turns 18 on Thursday. *tear* And she and my mom are going skydiving on Thursday. I don't have that desire, so I'll be videotaping it. I'm not really looking forward to the whole event. I am, however, looking for something really great to give her as a "you're an adult now" gift. And something she'll be able to keep forever. Jewelry maybe? Any ideas?

Also, something really great is about to happen. It happens every year and it's WONDERFUL! Yes, it's a bit smelly. Yes, it's crowded. Yes, the essence of gluttony and overindulgence (not to mention wastefulness). But oh my. Any true Minnesotan has to be a fan of the Great Minnesota Get Together. The food, oh the food! The food finder on-line even has a category for "on-a-stick"! An seriously, the foods on a stick will blow your mind. Who thinks of some of these things? Since I don't eat much meat, my guilty pleasure (because you have to have at least one thing on a stick while there) is cheese on a stick. It's so awful for you, but I say once a year its ok to have one. And then there's the mini-donuts. Oh, the mini-donuts! Sinful little balls of dough, cinnamon and sugar, and fat. Delectable. And, in talking to people in other states (and visiting other fairs) no one else seems to have mini-donuts! And, no, it's not like a funnel cake, they're WAY better. If you go to a fair in MN (not just the Great MN Get Together) you'll find mini-donuts and you have to get them at least once in a summer. I wait until the State Fair to get mine. Oh, and then. I mean, seriously, give me a break. Sweet Martha's cookies are UN-BE-LIEV-ABLE. If you go and don't get them, well, then, I don't even want to know you. Just kidding. Except not really. ;) And, if you are in town during the Fair, let me know if you need a partner to show you around! I LOVE the fair!

I have fallen in LOVE with a new messenger bag. I saw one at the airport when I was dropping someone off recently and was instantly smitten. I have been looking for a fun (and durable!) messenger bag for a long time. I've decided that what I want is really two bags. One leather and one in fun colors. Well, stop the search party! The fun colored one has been located! Hallelujah! [Side note: I actually found a leather one at a thrift store this spring (for like $15 too!) and I passed on it b/c I figured that I didn't really need it (which is probably true) so I left and then the next day after kicking myself the whole night, went back and of course it was gone. It was beautiful. Perfect strap depth, nice, dark brown leather, a little worn so it looked used and loved, but not too much so it wasn't useful anymore, and a good metal clasp. I still mourn that bag.] Enter Timbuk2 and the colored messenger bag. There's so much to choose from that I can't even decided what to get. Obviously, I'm going to build my own. And I'm pretty sure I'm going with the classic messenger bag and not the laptop bag, in a small. But, I want to see if I can see some fabric samples b/c I know the colors won't look the same in real life. I've seen the burnt orange and it's much more rusty in real life and the olive isn't as brown as it looks on-line. I want to know if the slate is as bright as it looks on-line. I really think I want to use the burnt orange, I just can't think what else to use it with. Any ideas?

Well, I could write more, but this is long enough. :) Back soon!

God's Sovereignty

2007-08-02T23:08:00.000-05:00

I got this email tonight from my executive director at work. I've edited the names and such so as to protect people's privacy. I also took out where I work. I work for a non-profit. If you are curious as to the name, I'm more than happy to tell you, I just think it's weird putting it out there for those creepy people wandering about (can you wander in cyberspace?).

"We are thanking God on several fronts for His awesome protection during the bridge collapse on Interstate 35 yesterday. This bridge is located just ¼ mile from our main center and is traveled hundreds of times by many of our students and staff as the main route to the Northeast metro area. I have heard almost a dozen stories from employees and students who were on this bridge just minutes before it went down. I want to share three of the most powerful miracles.

First, "Susie" our admissions supervisor told me in tears how at 6:00 last night she was ready to enter the I-35 Bridge over the Mississippi. The Holy Spirit spoke to her very abruptly to turn off the freeway and go a different way home. She obeyed the Holy Spirit arguing with him all the way. Since she takes this same route every day and her commute home takes almost an hour, detouring from the freeway and not crossing over the bridge didn't make sense. Shortly after she detoured from I-35, the bridge went down. "Susie" most likely would have been on that bridge.

The second testimony was told to me by dozens of our students. Every Wednesday night for the past 3 years our buses and vans are loaded and a caravan of vehicles transport our men over the I-35 Bridge to a local church. They leave our buildings at 6:00 and cross over the bridge at approximately 6:10. As the caravan of vehicles left the building, a staff who normally drives the bus stayed back with a group of sick students. He called one of the drivers to say that it might be best if "just tonight" they didn't go over the freeway bridge and instead took an alternative route. When the students arrived at the church and heard what had happened, the vast majority got on their knees and wept.

Lastly, my daughter (our executive director's daughter) who works at the University of Minnesota and is on that bridge every night at around 6:10 p.m. just happened to ask for the day off of work. She also could have been on this bridge.

Right now they say that over 50 cars are lying near or under the bridge on the bottom of the Mississippi River. They believe that most of these vehicles have fatalities. Thank God for His divine protection! Please pray for our city! Yesterday we had our Minneapolis Police Chief Tim Dolan and members of the Minneapolis City Council at chapel. It was a powerful time and at the end we prayed together for our city and for God's wisdom on our leaders and law enforcement. Little did we know that just hours later our city would experience the greatest catastrophe in Minnesota's history. Please keep us in prayer."

WOW. God's sovereignty is AMAZING. Why does my flesh want to rely on it's self so often? He is able to more than I can even imagine and yet I continually disobey him. Forgive me Lord.

Thank you Lord for your grace and protection of my co-workers. Thank you for the safety of those who were rescued from the wreckage and please comfort those who lost loved ones in this tragedy.

What a way to bring me back...

2007-08-01T21:46:00.000-05:00

I'm sorry I've been gone so long- this has been a busy summer! I promise to blog soon (tomorrow) about all that's going on in my life, but, please, pray from my city and those therein.

I'm sure by now you've heard of the bridge collapse on 35W. Currently, the city is in shock, and minor chaos. Night has fallen, so that brings an erie calm to things as it's harder to see the rescue workers pulling out cars and, sadly, bodies. They're telling us to stay off our cell phones (which is hard when people want to check on you and you them), they've called most fire/police departments in the surrounding suburbs in to help. Internet service is slow as well.

35 is a MAJOR highway here and the re-routing will be hard and congested for a long time to come. The thought that that piece of roadway is no longer there is unbelievable to me.

But, more than that, is that many people -they're currently reporting 6- have died (and many more are injured). I assume that number will rise as they see the scope of who fell into the Mississippi and drowned. I cannot imagine what they and their families are going through, so, please pray for them and my city as we go through this.

On a personal note, I am fine and so is everyone I know. I work about 2 miles from there at a large Christian non-profit and am praying that everyone with work with and for is safe. I was about 3 miles from the bridge collapse when it happened eating dinner with co-workers. Thankfully, I do not travel that route too often (way too congested usually), and had no need today to go that way. I am back at home now (about 12 miles from the scene of the accident) so I am definitely safe.

I will update as/if needed of more prayer requests.

Rough Day

2007-06-27T18:36:00.000-05:00

So, this morning, I got a (not so) great wake-up call. I didn't get the job. And, once again, I let it ruin my day. I hate when I do that. I allow Satan to use circumstances to affect my mood. That shouldn't be. I've just been such an Eyore lately and I hate it.

I know that God has something better for me out there, I know that God has a plan for my life- how many times have I encouraged other people with that, yet I am finding it a hard to believe it for myself.

So... in an avoidance effort, I followed Abby's lead and took a few "personality" quizzes to distract myself.

#1- This one is wierd... Me? Balanced? I certainly don't think so very often. Especailly today.

You Have A Type A- Personality

You are one of the most balanced people around

Motivated and focused, you are good at getting what you want

You rule at success, but success doesn't rule you.

When it's playtime, you really know how to kick back

Whether it's hanging out with friends or doing something you love!

You live life to the fullest - encorporating the best of both worlds

Do You Have a Type A Personality?

#2- This was also weird, b/c it was the same as Abby. I thought it was going to say somethign like Milan or Vennice. Wrong again!

You Belong in Dublin

Friendly and down to earth, you want to enjoy Europe without snobbery or pretensions.

You're the perfect person to go wild on a pub crawl... or enjoy a quiet bike ride through the old part of town.

What European City Do You Belong In?

#3- I just did the MB type thing, so I didn't do it again. I always get the same thing: ESFJ.

If only I could get a job now where I took online quizzes! ;)

Pagan baby

2007-06-25T21:07:00.000-05:00

I think I may want to name my first daughter Mary Twiggy.

*wipes tears from my eyes*

Oh, I do love the funny.

Yes, Lord.

2007-06-24T00:11:00.000-05:00

A few thoughts, as pull I out of this "blah" feeling.

1. Matt & Ginny (who I don't know) went through something similar to what my friends, the Joneses did this year. I love what Matt said here. I want, for my life, what their pastor prayed over them at their wedding.

"Enough blessing that they know Your hand is upon me. Enough difficulty to force me to You.”

That sounds about right.

2. Amanda had this today, and it's a great illustration of God's faithfulness.

3. God is so good. After I typed out my feelings last night, I went to bed, and spent a long time in prayer. As I woke this morning, again, He is gracious and gave me a new day, and a new perspective. I'm not feeling anxious about the job anymore. I am still anxious about other things, but I know He will work those out too. Thank you Lord, for your faithfulness.

4. That's really it. I just felt like I should have a 4th thing. ;)

Please pray....

2007-06-23T11:13:00.001-05:00

Two of God's delights Amy and Amelia, could use your prayers at this moment.

blah

2007-06-23T00:30:00.000-05:00

That's how I feel today. Blah.

I didn't get a call about the job today (in my head, I feel like I didn't get the job b/c I didn't get a call, obviously, that's not the only answer/option, but, I'm feeling really down about it all) and Satan used that to really mess with me. I want that job, and it's something that excites me, which I want out of a new job (my current job is stressful- more on that some other day, suffice it say that it gets hard emotionally seeing people struggle, and I don't know how much longer I can do it), but I'm afraid of a lot of things.

I'm afraid that I won't get something new (and more fun!). I'm afraid no one will want to hire me. I'm afraid I'll be living with my mom until I'm 80. I'm afraid no boy will ever pursue me again. I'm afraid I'll never get married. I'm afraid I'll never have kids (ok, those last things are obviously intertwined, but you get my drift). I'm afraid that this is "it" for my life.

I want good things to happen to me. Is that selfish? Yeah, probably, but that's honestly how I feel right now. BUT, I'm having a terribly rough day believing that God has good things in store for me. That He desires good things for me and that this is not "it". I know intellectually that someday I'll look back at this time in my life and wonder why I worried so much, but on this side of that time, worry is where I'm at.

Matthew 7: 9-11 says "Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!"

Jeremiah 29:11 says "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

I know these are true! Today, I having a hard time believing it. I'm clinging to my Savior, but today has been a hard day. Psalms 4 & 5 show David crying out to God- that is me tonight. Abba, hear my cry!

Interview update

2007-06-20T23:28:00.000-05:00

I had my final interview today at the university for the job I mentioned. I was under the impression that I was going to interview with a large group of people, maybe 5-6 people, instead, I had 6 one-on-one interviews with the "final round" people! I took almost two hours!

It. Was. Exhausting.

And then I wanted to cry.

Seriously. The interviewS went very well. I was happy with how I presented myself, happy with how I felt God leading the conversations, and happy with my "selling myself"-ness (a part I HATE about interviewing- don't they just KNOW I'm fantastic?). But I got in my car afterwards and just wanted to cry. And call my dad. I have been in a funk since Father's Day, so that could be part of it. Father's Day is so weird when you don't have an earthly father anymore to see or call or buy even just a card for. I mentioned my near crying fit to a co-worker afterwards and she thought that maybe since it was so long I was just intellectually spent and needed just an emotional release, which makes sense.

All that to say, it was a weird day. The interview went good (ok, great even, but I'm too much of a pessimist when it comes to things about me), but it was a strange day. I'm hoping to hear by Friday about whether I got the position or not. I'm nervous. I feel like I'll be a failure if I don't get it, which, I know isn't true, but that's how I feel.

If you're reading this, keeping praying for me, please! Thanks!

I won!

2007-06-19T09:33:00.000-05:00

I woke up this morning, checked my email before heading off to work, and had this email in my inbox from the ladies at Indie Babies!!!

"You have won the Ten Things Instant Freebie from last Friday’s post!!"

TEN things?????? Me?????? Alright!

I can't believe I won something! And it looks SO good.

Thanks ladies at Indie Babies! I'll certainly be regaling all (2 who read my little blog) about the products once I get them in the mail. I can't wait!